Okay, no we didn't. It's just that there's always the top, the bottom, and then there's Althea. Sort of like Maude.
Model: Lisa Blades
Well, Maude did a pretty damn fine outfit, we have to say.
It's stylish, it looks expensive, and it's perfect for St. Tropez (because it's stylish and looks expensive).
We love the metallic shorts, and the easy, breezy, sexy quality of the whole look.
Our criticism (and you know there is one) has to do more with the technical aspects.
It seems to us that Althea has some good design skills but not-so-good technical skills, which is why she winds up in the middle so much. If we had to guess, we think the judges tend to like her work quite a bit but give it a pass because it's often a little clumsy-looking, execution-wise.
Not that this looks is awful or anything. Just that the sheer top looks a little half-assed, and since the whole look revolves around that top, it needed to be flawless for it to work. Althea said as much to Tim in the workroom. It's a pretty good design and perfect execution could have bumped it up to the top three.
Dr. Whitfield seems to have settled into her role as "strong contender." She's only got one win under her belt, but it seems like it energized her a bit, mainly into talking about what a bitch Irina is.
As for her look...
Model: Tanisha Harper
Well, it's Uli 2.0. We don't like to make those types of comparisons ("She's totally ripping off Leanne!!!") because let's face it, fashion is about a limited number of elements that get reused time and again in various combinations. It's all variations on a theme and looks that remind us of other, earlier looks are an inevitability.
But seriously, this looks EXACTLY like an Uli dress.
Except Uli would have picked a better print. The judges all moistened themselves over this print and sure, we can see how they might like it, but it's only just alright to our eyes. To be honest, we thought it looked a little bedsheet-y.
She really bumped it up with that braiding detail. Nina really loved it and we have to say we agree. We normally find braided fabric to be clumsy and uncomfortable looking but she managed to give it a delicate nature it rarely has.
Even in the back. Braided straps often look a little like a yoke, but not here.
So, good job, CH. It's a bit of a cliche from an inspiration point of view, but it's extremely well made with some interesting details, which automatically sets it far ahead of the rest of the pack.
And Blue Hands comes roaring back strong with an "In your FACE, BITCH!" to Heidi.
Just when you think the little slav who could is down and out, she finds something inside her and pulls out a great, eye-popping design with which no (leggy, German, bitchy) detractor could find fault.
Model: Katie Sticksel
This is, in some respects, similar to CH's in that it comes right up to the border of cliche.
But, similar to CH, she did such a good job in the detailing and the execution, that the superiority of the look simply can't be denied.
Long story short: she nailed the look on very little money and with very little in the way of embellishment. She kept it simple and between the near-flawless execution and the shiny details, it gave the outfit a classy, understated, expensive look.
To be honest, we were not sold on the necklace until it showed up on the runway. It was looking a little "crafty" to us when she was working on it. But paired with the dress, it really works. We know she made it removable for use with other outfits but to our eyes, it's meant to be paired only with this dress.
There was a lot of pulling and puckering in the dress, but that all appeared to depend on how Katie was standing. For the most part, it's beautifully fitted and technically well done. We especially like the lines running through the dress, which lift it up from being boring.
So good job, Gordana! Show that leggy German how you don't take shit from no leggy Germans! It was practically killing her to admit it, no?
" I think it's a really sexy. sophisticated, sleek dress..."
"You want me to say what? No."
"It's urban...it's all of the things that really are very Park Avenue."
"I don't WANT to. She looks at me funny. And her hands are blue. And she cries all the time. Oh, fine."
"The little voice in my earpiece told me to say 'Good job."
"Oh. Uh, well thank them for me."
"Of course, the dog collar is not something I would wear. In fact - what?I'm just saying! I can't even say that I hate the collar?"
"Fine. Whatever. Good job. Get off my - I mean, you may leave the runway."
With this week's episode, Christopher has gone from being in the top three three times to being in the bottom three four times. Has anyone in the history of the show made that precipitous a fall, ever?
We were early supporters of the guy but with that many low showings - and worse, declaring each showing to be among your best work - we're left with the uncomfortable prospect that he's more of a dressmaker than a designer, at least at this stage.
Model: Matar Cohen
This? Doll clothes. Seriously. There's about as much design and detailing in this look as there is in the average cheap 6-outfit set for a Barbie knockoff you can find in the bargain bins by the register.
There's nothing there. Okay, yes. A belt. But that's it. That was the beginning and the end of his design process. Everything else wasn't just basic, it was practically invisible.
Technically, he did a decent job, but then again, we can't see anything here that even comes close to technically challenging.
It's just clothes. The kind of outfit you could put together for practically no money from practically any department store. That shouldn't be what Project Runway is about.
Personally, we adore the guy and we think he's made some very nice stuff both on and off the show, but we can't help thinking his trick bag is empty. He's going to have to pull out a major design for us to have faith again.
Um... ditto?
Seriously, we could just copy and paste the above captions and they'd be perfectly applicable.
Model: Celine Chua
At the sight of this ensemble, The Duchess flicked open her fan and reminded us why she's The Duchess: "They're clothes, they're not fashion."
EXACTLY.
There is virtually no sense of design or style to these pieces.
Like Christopher's belt, the only thing of any interest here are the suspenders and even they aren't exactly providing a focal point.
Exactly the same criticism applies: These could be picked up for nothing at a million stores the world over.
In fact, the more we look at these two looks, the more we think it was wrong of the judges to send Nicolas home. Sure, his look was off-concept, but at least it was designed. At least it had some detailing and a certain style to it. Lorenzo thinks Logan definitely should have gone home and Tom would have been fine if either of these two went home. All we can think is, if Nina had been sitting in that chair more often, these two never would have made it this far, with one boring outfit after another.
Aw, we feel a little bad. In a season where there simply wasn't a lot of raw material for the kind of bitchy joke-making that is our stock in trade, we zeroed in on Pocahontas/Peppermint Patty/Lesbian and let him have it.
Much like Irina's bitchiness, Nicolas at least added some personality to the season, even if we weren't ever completely 100% behind his designs.
Model: Kojii Helnwein
Until, ironically, this week. We think this is the best thing he's ever done for the competition.
But we also think the judges had a point in auf'ing him. Stylish as this is, it doesn't really say Greece in any way.
What he wound up with was an outfit that could be worn almost anywhere. Stylish, but not evocative in the way the challenge required.
We LOVE that top. It's once again in Nicolas's favorite non-color, white.
Granted, a Greece challenge practically requires white, but we can't help thinking how great this would look in a color.
And we like the pants well enough. There's a bit of a fit issue, unless he wanted a bunch of lines pointing directly at her vagina, in which case, attaboy.
The thing is, tight gray pants was where he went wrong. The top was a pretty strong piece. He could have done a ruffly white skirt and gotten away with it, but this was too urban while at the same time, too generic.
Although we have to say, we love those little horizontal pleats on the bottom.
He wouldn't have been our pick for the auf. He was off-concept but there were pieces on the runway that were off-concept and style-less, and this wasn't one of them.
We've forgotten Althea again!
Okay, no we didn't. It's just that there's always the top, the bottom, and then there's Althea. Sort of like Maude.
Model: Lisa Blades
It's stylish, it looks expensive, and it's perfect for St. Tropez (because it's stylish and looks expensive).
We love the metallic shorts, and the easy, breezy, sexy quality of the whole look.
Our criticism (and you know there is one) has to do more with the technical aspects.
It seems to us that Althea has some good design skills but not-so-good technical skills, which is why she winds up in the middle so much. If we had to guess, we think the judges tend to like her work quite a bit but give it a pass because it's often a little clumsy-looking, execution-wise.
