"We could've been more innovative but I'm working with someone who has very little experience so I had to scale down just to make sure we had a gown on the runway."
These two didn't make a very good team. They were pretty much drama-free, but that doesn't mean they were bringing the best out of each other. She's too much in her own head and he doesn't seem to have much patience for her inexperience. Result?
Model: Cerri McQuillan
Mediocre.
Once again, the crass question that we need to ask: Do you see 500 bucks here?
And where is the technical skill we've come to expect from Emilio?
And where's the sense of fun he brought to both of his previous garments?
It's basic and dour and not particularly well made.
Model: Valeria Leonova/Alison Gingerich
And while this is at least a much cuter dress, it wasn't without its problems. For one, what the hell does this have to do with Maya and Jay's dress? It shares not one similar design element except for color.
Let's bang this one out while we're getting the RuPaul screencaps, kittens.
We never could have predicted that these two would work well together. Not that either of them are problematic from a personality point of view, just that their styles seem so different. And yet, they were really cute together. If we were skinny little 21-year-old queens, we'd think Amy was the most fabulous and glamorous fruitfly we could wish for. We're telling you: it's that Streisand eye makeup. It just kills us.
Model: Holly Ridings
And it has to be said, they managed to put together a pretty fabulous look.
We love that they essentially created their own fabric from dozens of little pieces stitched together. Frankenfabric. It's a unique look and - we know we're not supposed to say this - it looked expensive.
And we REALLY loved that shrug/vest/ruffled tire thing.
Although we didn't quite love the way it came together in the back.
Still, we thought it was a really well done look with some innovation added. We honestly can't tell who was more responsible this design. From what little we know of the two of them at this point, it doesn't really look like either one of them. We suspect that's because, unlike a lot of the other teams, this was a true collaboration. Sharp-eyed minions point out that Amy wore a shrug like that to her audition. And since the gown kind of fits Jesus' over-the-top aesthetic, we guess this really was a true collaboration.
Models: Brandise Danesewich/Sophia Lee
And while we know how much most of you minions hate harem pants, we have to say that this was a truly ingenious way of reinterpreting Ping & Jesse's lace toga.
Also, we need to note that we were kind of sorry to see Sophia sent home. She's a bitch and a pain in the ass and we understand why no one wanted to work with her but she had a hell of a walk.
Anyway, this look. The reason we admire it is because the harem pants actually mimic the line of Ping's over-the-shoulder skirt pretty effectively.
And the tank top with just the hint of lace showing was a nice down-market way of interpreting the look. We don't LOVE this outfit from a style perspective, but we applaud it from a design perspective. In the immortal words of La Nina, they "really thought about it."
In the version of Project Runway that plays in our heads, these were the winning looks.
Those editors struggled mightily to wring some drama out of it but except for a couple sound bites, nothing much came of it.
Sure, it's possible he slacked off because he had immunity and that's not cool, but they managed to pull together to highly technical garments and we doubt she did all the work on her own.
Model: Valeria Leonova
See, if you're going to take the designers to a museum, show them a bunch of couture gowns, and ask them to make a signature look, this should have been exactly what the judges were looking for.
And to be fair, they did praise this to the heavens, but then they inexplicably praised Mila for making separates and handed the win to her. Oh, cracky judges. Don't ever change on us.
Anyway, this was an unusual and strikingly beautiful look that was styled to perfection, which in itself is unusual because the styling this season has been pretty bad so far.
And Valeria walked the hell out of it.
Now, those noodles weren't executed as well as they could have been and maybe this is where we and the judges parted ways. We would have given the slight technical problems a pass and awarded the win based on the design alone, but it's possible that the judges weren't thinking along those lines.
We agreed with Nina when she commented on how sexy that low, low cut on the side is.
Model: Brittany Oldehoff/Kasey Ashcroft
If we were members of the Geek Squad we would have been pissed, because the knockoff blows the 500 dollar version right out of the water.
Fifty bucks. Just keep reminding yourself of that. They did some amazing detail work here. Absolutely love the horizontal pleats in the front and the curved hem on the top. One thing we don't like (and it's nitpicky, we admit) is that big ol' button on the vest. It just looks a little "craft project" to us.
And the other minor criticism is that they really didn't reinterpret the original look that much. It's the same color, style, length, and silhouette as the original, just done better.
Of course, that might have been deliberate on their parts, but it might have been a factor in the judging. Still, they're our winners of the week.
Attention! The chess club will meet at 3:15 to have their yearbook photos taken! If this conflicts with your gaming club meeting, please see Mr. Tom or Mr. Lorenzo after homeroom to get a slip.
Model: Brittany Oldehoff
We're torn on this look.
We like it, for the most part. It's sporty and it's got some nice details.
And it fits her well, for the most part.
And while we like the seam placements, they're not executed as well as they could be.
But what really bothers us about this look is that it's supposed to be a signature look, put together with the highest budget of any PR challenge ever. Does this look like 500 bucks worth of fabric and 2 days of work to you? It's nice enough, but it just doesn't go there.
Model: Alexis Broker
And yet, strangely, they brought their A game to their B garment.
Models: Lorena Angjeli, Alexis Broker
We really love this look. It's a great (and instantly recognizable) interpretation of the original look. We really like the idea of that sporty jacket paired with a little black dress.
Although to be honest, the dress could have used a bit more loving attention.
But in looking over the looks for this episode, we've been getting frustrated because it looks like most of the teams just banged out a B look without putting too much thought and work into it. Not the geek squad, though. They really thought about it and turned out a look that's in some ways better than their A look. That jacket could have used a lining, though.
We are stacked, packed and ready to attack, poodles!
Darlings, we're just going to indulge in a little blogenfreude for a moment. Indulge us.
When we did the Meet the Designers posts for season 7, we indicated that we thought Jesse had the potential to be a little douchey and the general consensus in the comments was that we were horrible people for saying so. Cue the most recent "Auf-Wiedersehen" post, which is coming up on 300 comments, most of which are about what a douche Jesse was this past episode.
When we did Seth Aaron's MTD post, and when we did the post about his first dress, we said we thought he was talented and we couldn't understand why everyone was acting so negatively toward him. Once again, there were a lot of comments to the contrary and once again, we were right, bitches. You can disagree on the talented part if he's not to your taste, but he was a total sweetheart of a team mate and in the end, when it was obvious that his team was looking at the chopping block, he manned up even when he didn't have to.
The moral of the story? Listen to T Lo, kittens. No one can prejudge like we can.
They really were kind of an adorable team because despite the fact that their aesthetics and work styles were totally at odds with each other, they still managed to get along. Even when they were bickering, it was a cute kind of bickering. Come on, that "Don't act up in front of company" line was PRICELESS.
Model: Kristina Sajko
Too bad the results didn't measure up.
This isn't an awful dress, really. It's just a very done dress.
We like the back of the skirt quite a bit.
Look, innovation is not the be-all and end-all of the fashion world. Most really successful fashion designers aren't particularly innovative. But, this isn't the fashion world. This is Project Runway, which is essentially a fashion game show. In the world of PR, innovation is king because it is after all, a design competition and you are dealing with a panel of judges who've pretty much seen it all when it comes to fashion. So no, not a horrible dress (not a great one either), but it was obvious from the get-go that this was not the kind of dress that impresses Nina.
Models: Holly Ridings/Sarah Bell
And they honestly might have skated by if they hadn't sent this ill-advised mess down the runway. We realize that they weren't supposed to copy the original exactly, but what they wound up with just looked incredibly basic and cheap next to Jesus and Amy's original.
That lace had to have been awfully cheap because 1) it looks it, and 2) they only had 50 bucks for the whole look. We also don't like the color of the underlay. We guess it was supposed to look nude, but it just comes off dingy.
And the back, kittens. How awful is that? We doubt very much that her ass is huge but it sure looks it in this dress. And since the underlay almost matches her skin tone, from the back she looks awfully saggy and wrinkly.
But as per usual, no criticism we make can even compare to the master.
"These are both really ugly."
"Well, we tried to --"
"Did I say you could speak?"
"No ma'am."
"No. I didn't think I did."
"Now, do you understand the importance of me saying these are really ugly? Do you understand what it means when I say something that harsh to you?"
"Yes ma'am. It means --"
"You're speaking."
"..."
"You've had days to shoot your mouth off to the camera and explain yourself. This is my time. I do the speaking."
"May I? Or would you prefer to continue Open Mike Night on the runway?"
"No ma'am."
"When your dresses came out from behind that scrim, my soul cried."
"My. Soul. Cried.
Do you want to know why?"
"It cried for your poor models, forced to look ugly on national television. It cried for the crime you committed against 500 dollars worth of fabric. It cried for all of the other hopefuls who wanted to be on Project Runway but were rejected so you could be here to make ugly dresses. But mostly..."
"Mostly, my soul cried out in pain because you have made me look at something ugly and no one should ever make me look at something ugly. My entire adult life has been about ensuring that I would never have to look at ugly things.
So you see, you haven't just made two ugly dresses, you have wounded me to my very soul and trampled over my life's work and for what? So you could squeeze by and make it here another week? Was it worth it to you? Was it worth committing a crime against all that is beautiful and aesthetically pleasing in the world, just so you can have one more shot at a measly 100 grand?
I want you to think -- REALLY think -- about what you have done here today and the hundreds of thousands of people whose souls also cried out in horror and pain at what you have done. You have committed a fashionpocalypse. I hope you can live with yourselves."
Last but not...well actually, yeah. Kinda.
These two didn't make a very good team. They were pretty much drama-free, but that doesn't mean they were bringing the best out of each other. She's too much in her own head and he doesn't seem to have much patience for her inexperience. Result?
Model: Cerri McQuillan
Once again, the crass question that we need to ask: Do you see 500 bucks here?
And where is the technical skill we've come to expect from Emilio?
And where's the sense of fun he brought to both of his previous garments?
It's basic and dour and not particularly well made.
Model: Valeria Leonova/Alison Gingerich
And it too, is pretty damn basic.
Cute, absolutely, and well made. But basic.
